Sunday, August 31, 2008

Daddy K gives a shout to the Spartans

I love being active and I love sports, although a sports fan I'm not. Mama A is very happy that I'm not clamoring (and whining) to watch every football, baseball or basketball game. Once is a great while I'll get a chance to go to a game or two, maybe catch some of a game on T.V.

However, I must give a shot out to the SJSU Spartans football team for starting off the season right, beating the UC Davis Aggies 13-10. Go Spartans my alma mater! Two years ago they won the New Mexico Bowl, a first in almost 20 years, and now it's time to do it again. They started off sluggish in the game, but third-string quarterback Kyle Reed rallied them to victory. That'll get him the starting QB slot next week against Nebraska.


Our good friend Nancy, also a proud SJSU alum, gave us a little SJSU Spartans baby beanie for Baby B. Can't wait for homecoming (our anniversary this year of all things)!


Oh, yeah. It's a Raider Nation as well. Right Troy (another Spartan alum)?


Baby B is between two worlds

I know a woman's body is only flesh and bone

A woman's body is only flesh and bone

How come I can't let go?

I'm between two worlds

I said oh yeah, I'm out of my mind

I'm between two worlds

--Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers


I have no idea what Tom was really thinking of when he wrote those lyrics back in the early 80s. Probably not about pregnancy. But when I heard it in my mix last week when I was running, it got me thinking about where we've been and where we're at.


This is one of my favorite pictures from our wedding almost five years ago now. Amy's father, Carl, lovingly delivered the ceremony and married us. We wrote our own vows as well, and every October 11 we go down to the place where we met on the beach almost 11 years ago and read those vows to one another.


But what were we thinking in that picture? It certainly wasn't about having children. No, that would take another four years to evolve.


And here we are. Thirty-eight weeks pregnant. Amy started maternity leave a few days early last week, because when she woke up Wednesday morning, she said to me, "I don't want anybody touching me and I don't want to touch anyone." That's difficult not to do when you work in physical therapy.


No worries, my dear. It's time to relax with the relaxin and chill out. It could be anytime now. We set up the birthing tub in Baby B's room and our midwife gave me home birth kit just in case something happened and I had to birth the baby.


Are you kidding me? Well, I'm not cutting the nails. I told you that. (Don't worry, folks. Kathe will be here.)


Baby B is between two worlds. In fact, next to death, I believe being in the womb is the closet we ever get to heaven. In that ethereal place where stars collide and worlds are born, the spark of human life is tethered to mother and the heart of the universe, the very heart of God.


It's exciting that someday we can tell B he/she was born at home in his/her very room. So come out right and on time, you little honey B.

Daddy K finds some fun with kids’ musical instruments

Oh my, how much fun is this? A group called Plastica covered a classic Rush instrumental called YYZ (which Plastica lovingly calls YY Me). And it's all done with kids' musical instruments and a few bottles for good measure (get it, good measure?).


For fans, this was an amazing cover. For wannabe musicians and soon to be fathers, inspiring.


Enjoy.



Friday, August 29, 2008

Daddy K at home in the DadLabs crib

I love the daddies over at DadLabs. These guys rock and their videos are informative and quite funny. One of their videos for newbie dads is all about the importance of bonding with your baby.


Think I'm going to have a problem with cuddlin' Baby B? Nah. Don't think so.


I invite you dads out there to join me at the DadLabs. Heck, bring some beer – but drink responsibly mind you. I've got a baby coming.



Daddy K learns the truth of Snow’s strength

One of the Daddy blogs I try to keep up with is Building Camelot. One of Tyler's latest posts was about the late Tony Snow and he shared an essay from Tony that I thought was poignant and beautiful. While I don't subscribe to Tony's political beliefs, and don't exactly play by the same Christian playbook, his words moved me as a father-to-be and as someone who has loved ones who battle illness and others who have struggled with loss of many kinds.

There's nothing more for to say other than reposting the post below. Enjoy and God bless.


***


Political beliefs aside, this testimony from Tony Snow speaks to the heart of men, husbands and fathers about the importance of self sacrifice and humility in life.


His words emphasize the importance of being a strong, yet humble man for our children and wives. Although we may not be able to see, with as much clarity, the importance of our blessings in life, we can draw inspiration from his words and start living as better husbands and fathers.


When he talks about strength through humility, he is revealing the secret to building your own Camelot. We, as husbands and fathers, struggle with this on a daily basis and hopefully we'll realize this and work on it before it's too late.


Tony Snow died of cancer on July 12th 2008. He had three children.


***


Blessings arrive in unexpected packages, in my case, cancer.


Those of us with potentially fatal diseases - and there are millions in America today - find ourselves in the odd position of coping with our mortality while trying to fathom God's will. Although it would be the height of presumption to declare with confidence 'What It All Means,' Scripture provides powerful hints and consolations. The first is that we shouldn't spend too much time trying to answer the 'why' questions: Why me? Why must people suffer? Why can't someone else get sick? We can't answer such things, and the questions themselves often are designed more to express our anguish than to solicit an answer.


I don't know why I have cancer, and I don't much care. It is what it is, a plain and indisputable fact. Yet even while staring into a mirror darkly, great and stunning truths begin to take shape. Our maladies define a central feature of our existence: We are fallen. We are imperfect. Our bodies give out. But despite this, or because of it, God offers the possibility of salvation and grace. We don't know how the narrative of our lives will end, but we get to choose how to use the interval between now and the moment we meet our Creator face-to-face.


Second, we need to get past the anxiety. The mere thought of dying can send adrenaline flooding through your system. A dizzy, unfocused panic seizes you. Your heart thumps; your head swims. You think of nothingness and swoon. You fear partings; you worry about the impact on family and friends. You fidget and get nowhere. To regain footing, remember that we were born not into death, but into life, and that the journey continues after we have finished our days on this earth. We accept this on faith, but that faith is nourished by a conviction that stirs even within many non-believing hearts - an intuition that the gift of life, once given, cannot be taken away. Those who have been stricken enjoy the special privilege of being able to fight with their might, main, and faith to live fully, richly, exuberantly - no matter how their days may be numbered.


Third, we can open our eyes and hearts. God relishes surprise. We want lives of simple, predictable ease, smooth, even trails as far as the eye can see, but God likes to go off-road. He provokes us with twists and turns. He places us in predicaments that seem to defy our endurance; and comprehension - and yet don't. By His love and grace, we persevere. The challenges that make our hearts leap and stomachs churn invariably strengthen our faith and grant measures of wisdom and joy we would not experience otherwise.


'You Have Been Called'


Picture yourself in a hospital bed. The fog of anesthesia has begun to wear away. A doctor stands at your feet; a loved one holds your hand at the side. 'It's cancer,' the healer announces. The natural reaction is to turn to God and ask him to serve as a cosmic Santa. 'Dear God, make it all go away. Make everything simpler.' But another voice whispers: 'You have been called.' Your quandary has drawn you closer to God, closer to those you love, closer to the issues that matter, and has dragged into insignificance the banal concerns that occupy our 'normal time.'


There's another kind of response, although usually short-lived an inexplicable shudder of excitement, as if a clarifying moment of calamity has swept away everything trivial and tiny, and placed before us the challenge of important questions. The moment you enter the Valley of the Shadow of Death, things change. You discover that Christianity is not something doughy, passive, pious, and soft. Faith may be the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen. But it also draws you into a world shorn of fearful caution. The life of belief teems with thrills, boldness, danger, shocks, reversals, triumphs, and epiphanies.


"it is through selflessness and service that God wrings from our bodies and spirits the most we ever could give"


Think of Paul, traipsing through the known world and contemplating trips to what must have seemed the antipodes (Spain), shaking the dust from his sandals, worrying not about the morrow, but only about the moment. There's nothing wilder than a life of humble virtue, for it is through selflessness and service that God wrings from our bodies and spirits the most we ever could give, the most we ever could offer, and the most we ever could do.


Finally, we can let love change everything. When Jesus was faced with the prospect of crucifixion, he grieved not for himself, but for us. He cried for Jerusalem before entering the holy city. From the Cross, he took on the cumulative burden of human sin and weakness, and begged for forgiveness on our behalf. We get repeated chances to learn that life is not about us, that we acquire purpose and satisfaction by sharing in God's love for others. Sickness gets us part way there. It reminds us of our limitations and dependence. But it also gives us a chance to serve the healthy. A minister friend of mine observes that people suffering grave afflictions often acquire the faith of two people, while loved ones accept the burden of two peoples' worries and fears.


'Learning How to Live'


Most of us have watched friends as they drifted toward God's arms, not with resignation, but with peace and hope. In so doing, they have taught us not how to die, but how to live. They have emulated Christ by transmitting the power and authority of love. I sat by my best friend's bedside a few years ago as a wasting cancer took him away. He kept at his table a worn Bible and a 1928 edition of the Book of Common Prayer. A shattering grief disabled his family, many of his old friends, and at least one priest. Here was an humble and very good guy, someone who apologized when he winced with pain because he thought it made his guest uncomfortable. He retained his equanimity and good humor literally until his last conscious moment. 'I'm going to try to beat [this cancer],' he told me several months before he died. 'But if I don't, I'll see you on the other side.'


His gift was to remind everyone around him that even though God doesn't promise us tomorrow, he does promise us eternity, filled with life and love we cannot comprehend, and that one can in the throes of sickness point the rest of us toward timeless truths that will help us weather future storms. Through such trials, God bids us to choose: Do we believe, or do we not? Will we be bold enough to love, daring enough to serve, humble enough to submit, and strong enough to acknowledge our limitations? Can we surrender our concern in things that don't matter so that we might devote our remaining days to things that do?


Will we be bold enough to love, daring enough to serve, humble enough to submit, and strong enough to acknowledge our limitations?


When our faith flags, he throws reminders in our way. Think of the prayer warriors in our midst. They change things, and those of us who have been on the receiving end of their petitions and intercessions know it. It is hard to describe, but there are times when suddenly the hairs on the back of your neck stand up, and you feel a surge of the Spirit. Somehow you just know: Others have chosen, when talking to the Author of all creation, to lift us up, to speak of us!


This is love of a very special order. But so is the ability to sit back and appreciate the wonder of every created thing. The mere thought of death somehow makes every blessing vivid, every happiness more luminous and intense. We may not know how our contest with sickness will end, but we have felt the ineluctable touch of God.


We don't know much, but we know this: No matter where we are, no matter what we do, no matter how bleak or frightening our prospects, each and every one of us who believe, each and every day, lies in the same safe and impregnable place, in the hollow of God's hand.


Tony Snow

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

My, what a nice pelvis you have…

Yesterday was our big 37-week check-up with our midwife and the pelvic region is ready! Baby B is dropping into the tunnel of love head first; Mama A is 50% effacing with regular Braxton Hicks contractions – but nothing else escalating…yet. Estimated weight – 7.5 pounds. Heart beat a steady 140 bpm. Buzzing around the womb like a hyper honey bee.

(The couple that came to our birth planning meeting had their second child last weekend, birthed by our midwife, and the baby girl weighed almost 12 pounds. Amy looked at me meekly and said, "Please, no.")


The big B birthday could happen in the next week or two. We're going to pick up the birthing tub this weekend and then I'll have an indoor Jacuzzi for short time. Sweet. Got everything on the birthday checklist. Check.


I told my mom last night that we're as ready as we're going to be. All the reading, the listening to birth stories, the family and friend advice, the midwife coaching (you rock, Kathe) – all have been invaluable. But now it's time for hands-on training. Now it's time. (I could share what I've learned about sphincter law, but I'll let you think about it first.)


The only thing I'm afraid of is the cutting of Baby B's nails. Really. Yes, we have little mittens ready to go in case they're too long, but cutting them, no way. Years ago I tried to cut my dog's nails (good ol' Joshua), cut one to the quick and he bled all over the frickin' place. Scared me to death.


Bring on the meconium and the pee and the placenta and the plutonium – but I ain't cuttin' the nails. Please don't make me cut the nails.

Sunday, August 24, 2008

Daddy K goes back to school, and man is it cool

Baby B is years away from going to school, but it's never too soon for Daddy K and Mama A to get into the back to school shopping mode. A couple of weeks ago we went "back to school" shopping for our dear friend, Nancy, who's starting her first year of teaching 2nd grade this week. Good luck Nancy! We got her all sorts of fun supplies including a 2 GB USB flash drive shaped like an eraser. Awesome.

I have very fond memories of going back to school shopping as a child – and the best part of all was the hip and fresh new binder organizer with as many hidden pockets and zipper packs as possible. Oh how I enjoyed getting everything organized in my organizer and jamming it full of fresh binder paper, pens, pencils and erasers. Yes, I was excited to learn – and to be ready to learn. Each and every year mine would be used to the point of disrepair, just in time for the summer break and then to buy anew before September started. That was my gadgetry long before laptops, cell phones, iPhones and iPods. For those South Park fans out there (and I bet most of my readers aren't), there was the Trapper Keeper episode. Nothing more to add there.


So the prospect of someday picking out organizers and gadgetry for B is more than I can bear. Don't know if I can wait for that.


Must go buy now. Must buy. Must.