The third shower’s the charm: Baby B is blessed with birthing stories

The ladies from VibrantCare, the physical therapy clinic where Mama A works, threw her one more baby shower. Oh how we are blessed with such loving and supportive people in our lives. Thank you Annee and Ching!

This one was strictly chicks-only, and I was happy to stay home and tend to my honey-do list and blogging and catching up on work (if that were possible).

The highlight for Mama A was when the other mothers shared their birth stories – very touching and moving for everyone there. We've been hearing many birth stories and reading them as well, and they've been informative and helpful, acclimating us to the bone-crushing depths of the deep contraction seas ahead. (I know, we have no idea until we're in those moments.)

Believe it or not, Amy won the "guess the belly measurement with a length of string" game. She must have the inside scoop (wink).

The shower cake was a score as well because we know what happens when mama don't get her cake.

Thanks again to everyone pitching tents in B's camp!

The Baby B ticker shows 26 days. Gulp. Gotta go fill the birthing tub. Someone boil some water and tear up the sheets.

The letter B: Daddy K’s laptop lament

Dear Baby B,

It's been a busy week and I didn't make time to blog. (I made time to talk to you and read to you, though!) I could have, one can always make time for things, but I didn't. No B, it's been another busy week in the glamorous world of hi-tech marketing and public relations – many new clients coming onboard soon. It's also been a busy baby week since last week's shower. What did you think of all those different vibes?

For the past month I've been experiencing computer problems, hi-tech hiccups that impact performance dramatically. And yesterday the blue screen of death as they affectionately call it (who's they, B?) hit me four times in less than two hours. You could say I was concerned.

But not stressed. In fact, I took the opportunity to reflect, call my folks and my nephew, and daydream of a life with you and Mama A. (Of course I had my hand iPhone to check e-mail and such. Who needs business productivity software when I've got the PhoneSaber?)

Not sure what I'll need to do with my laptop yet. However, I'm sure about love, forgiveness and acceptance.

What the heck does my computer problems have to do with love and forgiveness and acceptance? Work with me here, B.

I'm listening to a podcast from This American Life (a public radio series I highly recommend – if it's still around when you're old enough) about two babies switched at birth, and 43 years later the truth of what happens comes out and it's pretty heavy for both families (who knew each other).

The catch is that one of the mothers knew they took the wrong baby home, brought it to her husband's attention, an evangelical minister, and he told her that they shouldn't say anything as to not to disgrace their doctor.

Granted It was 1951, but still hard to believe. Forty-three years later when the truth was told, it was devastating for both families. I'm still listening to it so I don't know the conclusion yet and where the families are now.

Can you imagine? And what about our perception of the facts as presented to the listeners of the show? The show does do a really good job of revealing both sides of the stories, but stories, like us, are more multi-faceted than two-sided, so it's difficult to judge indiscriminately. Plus the fact we can be selfish in our evaluation of others, how we see them aligns with our world view and how close the person is to us. We delude ourselves into thinking our way is the only way (yes, we're guilty as well).

Your mama and I have been seen in different light over the years, and while it used to bother me more than it should, it fascinates me now. One of us controls the other, we don't' like each other's friends or family, we're selfish for not having children, we're selfish for having children, we're arrogant because we're happy - blah, blah, blah.

It's flatulent garbage that comes from the fear of the way we've chosen to live our lives – happy and direct and true to our hearts without secret or shame. We're a team and always have been. I've made mistakes just as she has and we're going to make them as parents as well.

However, there will be no switched-at-birth secrets for us, B. But you already know that, because that's why you're on your way. God's will is to be responsible and heal the heart and home, not to surrender and feed the fear and the foolhardy. It took a long time for me to get here, but I'm glad your mama waited for me by the sea...

That which you manifest is before you. You reap what you sow. Be mindful of each moment lived within and without. Not everyone has the emotional or spiritual capacity to feel these; there are multi-faceted reasons we'll never understand.

So B, after you strip away the day from a busy week and a broken laptop all you have left is love, forgiveness and acceptance.

I love you and will see you soon!

Daddy K

--

Well I guess we all have these feelings

We can't leave unreconciled

Some of them burned on our ceilings

Some of them learned as a child

The things that we're concealing

Will never let us grow

Time will do its healing

You've got to let it go

I find no absolution

In my rational point of view

Maybe some things are instinctive

But there's one thing you could do

You could try to understand me --

I could try to understand you...

--Neil Peart

Well, it’s what you do to a Search – Baby B thinks Pooh is brilliant

As if we didn't have enough fun last weekend at the first shower with the Fisher Vista gals, this weekend was the big family/friends shower. And my oh my, was it a humdinger. Thank you Nancy for organdizing it all. We truly appreciate it!

Amy's sister's family came to visit, her Mother, other family friends and most of her dearest friends. My cousin Sherri came who we haven't seen for a few years. Such a pleasant surprise! Sadly my parents couldn't attend; the trek from Oregon takes its toll these days and will come down again after the baby's born (and we plan on going there for Christmas). But we did talk to them virtually via Skype and a web-cam. After busting my Dad's chops he finally got the web-cam set up so they can talk to Baby B when it comes and Baby B can see its grandfolk. In fact, any of our family and friends who live far away can get set up virtually as well – I'd be happy to help.

Good times ensued. Lots more fun games for the ladies (with their unadulterated chatter – mercy! – check out the video), but this time there were more guys who needed to do guy things out in the backyard where only guys roam and roar. Sweet. Playing ninja-army-warrior battle and then running through the sprinklers makes us complete men. Roar.

Whether you attended our showers or not, we know many who struggle in today's harsh financial climate. We can't tell you enough how much we appreciate your generous gifts, thoughts, blessings and prayers.

Stephanie's gift was especially poignant – it consisted of a bag full of rocks and crystals, and a lovely moon box, and each one of us picked out a rock/crystal, shared a blessing for Baby B, and then placed it in the moon box. Jill made us a baby blanket, spit rags (can't have enough of those I've been told), and classic Winnie the Pooh wall hangings. Nothing finer than handmade gifts.

Man, love that Pooh. Brilliant.

"Now," said Rabbit, "this is a Search, and I've Organized it –"

"Done what to it?" said Pooh.

"Organized it. Which means – well, it's what you do to a Search, when you don't all look in the same place at once. So I want you, Pooh, to search by the Six Pine Trees first, and then work your way towards Owl's house, and look out for me there. Do you see?"

"No," said Pooh. "What –"

"Then I'll see you at Owl's House in about an hour's time."

"Is Piglet organdized too?"

"We all are," said Rabbit, and off he went.

John 15:12

This is My commandment: that you love one another [just] as I have loved you.

Amen.

Mama A eats poo candy. Really.

A special thank you to the ladies of HRmarketer.com for throwing us a fabulous baby shower yesterday!

I was designated picture-taker and recorder – but of course participated in the fun games as well. One of the memorable moments was the guess the melted candy bar in the newborn diaper game. Always a big hit. I played it years ago at a coed shower for an old colleague of mine and it is a gross, knee-slapping hoot.

Check out the video of it here.

We were all really hungry, but Mama A couldn't wait for the good eats everybody brought – so she ate the candy bars. Yes, the poo candy. Love that woman! She ain't afraid.

We also had a Winnie the Pooh piñata that we beat the stuffing out of – and fun stuffing did it have. Soap bubbles and toe rings and candy and magic pads and all sorts of goodies.

Thankfully there was a guy gift I won during the afternoon festivities – a San Francisco Giants Pez dispenser, complete with the little candied soaps (ever since I was little Pez candy tasted a little soapy). Go Giants! (Yes, it's a painful season to become a fan, but those are the best kind.)

Aren't we supposed to wait and have Baby B before we have this much fun?

No way. Rock on with the fun. Rock on.