Responsible parenting and leadership are a start. In between reaching for the sky (Toy Story rocks).

Screw the darkness. I prefer the lightness of Pop.

Tuesday, January 6, 2009

The B tantrum classic – “Not the mama, not the mama!”

A couple of months ago we were going for stroll/hike with little Bea up at Henry Cowell State Park, and right before we left we witnessed this exchange between a mother and young daughter:

The young daughter cried and whined while walking quickly away from her mother.

The mother called out, "You know, four-year-olds don't throw tantrums."

The daughter fired back, "Oh yes they do!"


Last night, little Bea played on the floor with Daddy, laughing and gurgling and talking baby jive (excuse me stewardess, I speak jive), while Mama worked on the computer.

Then Bea was done. And as I held her in my arms trying to keep her calm, she threw an infant tantrum – flailing her legs, making fists, burying and rubbing her face against my chest, drooling and snotting on my chest, and crying with a reverse wheeze on the inhale.


I commented on Facebook and one of friends reminded me of that old Jim Henson production from the early 90s titled Dinosaurs. Every time the daddy dinosaur got close to the baby dinosaur, the baby would cry out, "Not the mama, not the mama!"


I don't take the infant tantrums personally because they aren't personal. They're primal. Beatrice just wanted Mama and Mama's milk, plain and simple.

Here's a great tip from an expert on

Babies have an amazing — and often aggravating — ability to make demands. But your baby needs to know that you care about her feelings, even when she expresses them by screaming or flailing her fists. It may look like she's throwing a fit, but she's really seeking reassurance. As long as you stick with your original decision — for instance, that she can't play with the remote control — no one can accuse you of "giving in." You're just giving her what she needs.

But, when Bea wants the boobs, I can't give her what she needs – not the mama, not the mama.


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