The Freedom to Thrive

When I first wrote about the high school incident in Visalia last month where a small group of eight ASB students made the shirts they wore spell out “2 FAG6OTS”, there were those who warned me not to read the online comments. Not comments about my article; they were the comments on one of the original news postings about the incident. 

I didn't read them, because most of the time these days online comments are horrible and offensive, but someone did share with me that many of the comments supported the students' free speech.

Free speech to use an offensive slur toward 8th graders who were at high school orientation. Welcome to high school, kids. 

This prompted me to research more about the First Amendment to the U.S. Constitution, which guarantees fundamental freedoms of religion, speech, press, assembly, and petition, primarily restricting government interference. 

It was adopted in 1791 as part of the Bill of Rights and protects against state-imposed religion and allows for free expression, though these rights are not absolute, excluding obscenity, true threats, and incitement.

The First Amendment broadly protects freedom of speech, even speech that is offensive, hateful, or deeply disturbing. The U.S. Supreme Court has repeatedly ruled that the government generally cannot prohibit speech just because it is hateful or offensive.

And that sucks, doesn't it? I think it does. Even with the authoritarian movement in this country, we still have the Constitution and the Bill of Rights. I can speak my mind as I do here in this forum and not be jailed for it. Not yet anyway.

But that also means we can say some pretty offensive and intimidating things to each other without fear of legal reprisal. Again, that sucks.

There are limits, however. Important exceptions include:

• Speech — including hate speech — is not protected if it falls into certain unprotected categories, such as:
• True threats (serious expressions of intent to commit violence)
• Incitement to imminent lawless action (encouraging immediate violence or illegal acts — Brandenburg v. Ohio)
• Harassment (especially in workplace or school settings under civil rights laws)
• Fighting words (direct, face-to-face insults likely to provoke immediate violence — though this doctrine is narrow and rarely applied today)
• Defamation

Something interesting to note is that the U.S. does not have a general “hate speech exception” to the First Amendment. Many other democracies (like Germany, Canada, and the UK) do restrict hate speech more broadly, but the U.S. typically does not.

But schools do have the authority to respond when speech crosses the line into harassment, intimidation, or bullying that interferes with a student’s ability to learn or feel safe at school.

Let that sink in — schools do have the authority to respond when speech crosses the line into harassment, intimidation, or bullying that interferes with a student’s ability to learn or feel safe at school.

I'm on my local school board in Santa Cruz and my district shared some important background about when the speech crosses the line. Under California Education Code 48900.4, a student may be disciplined for harassment, threats, or intimidation directed toward a student or staff member that is sufficiently severe or pervasive that it disrupts classwork, creates substantial disorder, or creates an intimidating or hostile educational environment. It’s important to clarify that a racial slur, though it may not be pervasive, is severe. 

Education Code 48900 allows schools to discipline students for bullying, which includes verbal acts, written communication, or electronic communication directed at one or more students that is severe or pervasive and that causes emotional harm, fear for personal safety, or substantial interference with a student’s participation in school. The law specifically recognizes bullying based on actual or perceived characteristics such as race, ethnicity, religion, gender identity, sexual orientation, disability, or other protected characteristics.

It is important to note that the legal standard used in harassment and bullying cases is “severe or pervasive.” This means the conduct does not need to be repeated over time if the behavior is serious enough. In some cases, a single incident may meet the standard if it is sufficiently severe. Racial slurs directed at a student can fall into this category, particularly when the language targets a student’s identity and creates humiliation, intimidation, or a hostile learning environment.

It's true that schools cannot discipline students solely for speech that would be protected by the First Amendment if expressed off campus. But the incident referenced above happened on campus, during school hours, and during an orientation assembly for 8th graders.

Really. Harassment, intimidation, or bullying that interferes with a student’s ability to learn or feel safe at school.

That's why I'm grateful of our Superintendent’s Student Advisory on Race & Equity in Santa Cruz that was formed in 2020 to elevate student voices around issues of race, equity, and school climate. The Advisory provides recommendations to ensure schools are safe, inclusive, and supportive for all students.

Our school board recently adopted updated Board Policy and approved a new resolution drafted by the Student Advisory on Race & Equity that called for eliminating the use of the N-word and all hate speech. Yes, the N-word. Today. Over 60 years after the Civil Rights Act and all the important anti-racist work since. 

Back to the Visalia Unified School District, the one I grew up in decades ago. Do you think those 8th graders the slur was directed at will feel safe at their new high school now? Based on the latest news I've read about this, the involved students have faced “disciplinary action,” according to the district, but officials said specifics of the investigation — including how many students were involved and how they were disciplined — won’t be made public. Being on my local school board, I get that. 

Whatever the disciplinary action, I hope the students who were involved reflect on what they did and understand how it created a humiliating, intimidating, and hostile learning environment for those students they targeted. Even if they grew up being taught that being LGBTQ+ is "wrong" due to religious beliefs, etc., it's not okay to harass, intimidate, or bully because they don't like it.

Same goes for me and my family — we can speak out against those who discriminate against any race, ethnicity, religion, gender identity, sexual orientation, disability, or other protected characteristics. We don't like it, but we're not going to harass, intimidate, or bully them to change their minds. We'll do our best to educate and create a mutual understanding of what the hate speech does to the children and adults on the receiving end. 

So, yes, you're free to be hateful and offensive in this country. And when you lead with "hey, it's free speech", that you can say whatever you want whenever you want, without denouncing demeaning and destructive language directed at specific groups of people for whatever reason, then you're making the world less safe for families everywhere. 

Thank you for letting me speak my truth. Let's reinvest in the freedom to thrive, not destroy.

Our Kids, Our Future

I told my wife Amy I'd only help sell the drinks for the PTA if I could be in the shade. And that's exactly where the table was when we got to our middle school, but it was still 85 degrees with only a little sea breeze. I set up the water, soda, and juice station nonetheless, preparing to ask for donations. Our oldest daughter Beatrice, now in high school, helped me set up, then vanished. Amy was inside the school running the PTA table and our 7th grader Bryce was preparing to sing in the choir. I was on my own for middle school open house.

It was nice to see old friends whose kids have been going to school with ours since forever. We were only asking for $1 PTA donations for the drinks, and because of the heat and the taco truck nearby serving delicious food, folks flocked to my table. Soon there was nothing left but a few waters. That's when the classroom open house started. 

Amy and I went to each of Bryce's classes, in her regular schedule order, and got to meet and hear from her teachers. It was a great turnout overall and most of the classrooms where full of eager parents wanting to learn what was in store for their children. 

It was the same story the next night when we went to Beatrice's high school open house. Except it was over 20 degrees cooler. That's Santa Cruz for you. I should've sold drinks that night for sure. Beatrice was excited to help us find each of her classes, and again, we really enjoyed meeting all her teachers. 

Being on our local school board, I have the privilege of serving our community, our district teachers, our district staff, and most importantly, our district kids TK-12. It was inspiring to hear this year all our teaching positions were filled! This hasn't been easy here or in many districts throughout California and the rest of the United States. Especially in rural areas. And now the teacher shortage has gotten worse, declining 16%, even after a seven-year increase in the number of new teacher credentials issued in California.

Public education is one of the cornerstones of a sound and thriving democracy. And while democracy isn't exactly thriving right now, I have hope that it will hold. What else does public education mean to America, and to our family? 

These reasons (according to the California School Board Association - CSBA and the Masters in Governance course I'm taking as a school board member): 

• A tuition-free education for all students.
• The promise of equal educational opportunities no matter race, religion, or ability.
• A commitment to high standards and high expectations for all students.
• A system of governance that ensures public accountability.

The public school system is not without its challenges, though, including teaching and staffing shortages, declining enrollment, budget shortfalls, navigating the academic and behavioral setbacks that occurred during COVID, fewer resources for students with special needs and those with cultural and language needs, divisive culture wars, mental health struggles, antiquated curriculum for some, among other challenges. There are also alternatives for families when the public school system doesn't work for them. 

But the public school system has provided our children with the educational resources and quality teaching since preschool that have helped them thrive academically and socially. I see that district-wide now as a board member, from elementary to secondary. Our daughter Beatrice might even want to be a teacher someday, and we couldn't be prouder. This is why I'm hopeful after meeting teacher after teacher who teach all the kids in our district. Who prepare our kids for college and/or career. Who help our kids believe they can be the best versions of themselves -- inclusive and empathetic critical thinkers. Our kids, our future. That's what it's all about.

The Most Grateful Gift Of All

She stood with some of her classmates at the foot of the stage stairs waiting for her turn. That's when I asked the other school board member on stage to switch with me. This was a proud moment for our family and I wasn't going to miss the opportunity to hand our oldest child her promotion certificate.

No, it wasn't college or high school yet, but it was an important transitional milestone: the 8th grade. After three years of middle school, the first of which was distance learning during the heart of the pandemic, Beatrice finished strong.

We never doubted she would; she worked hard to finish strong and we supported her along the way. It does take a little more hard work for her than her sister Bryce, but regardless, she thrived. She thrived academically and socially. However, emotionally she's now a teen, so there's been some drama the past year that we've all managed to get through. 

Out of everything she experienced during middle school, leadership was and is her thing. She's getting ready to be a junior leader again for a summer day camp; she loves working with kids. She was also her favorite 6th grade teacher's teaching assistant this last semester, which sometimes gave her extra study time when he didn't have anything for her to do. She's always needed a little more support since preschool and we are so grateful for all the classroom support she's received -- from preschool to 8th grade and what will continue through her high school years to come. 

And because of all these experiences and the support she received, she's told us she may just be a teacher someday. That would be fantastic! In fact, she's told us she wants to be a teacher and an artist. 

Public schools get a bad wrap these days about the education they deliver, and funding shortfalls always make it harder for school districts to recruit and retain quality teachers. We've been fortunate to have had some amazing and supportive teachers who have delivered the highest quality education throughout the years for both our daughters. 

Being on our local school board has given me an insight into public education realities, its struggles and successes, for all the students in our district. Which is why I was so grateful and proud to be onstage during Beatrice's 8th grade promotion to congratulate all the students.

Of course, hugging my own daughter and handing her the promotion certificate was the most grateful gift of all. 

Listen and Love First

In a sea of thousands, I felt seen. Again. I listened to his story, and although I knew it was nothing like mine, in a way, it actually was. The moment he finally felt seen and heard was pivotal for him, and it reminded me of mine.

Here I was at my first school board conference with nearly 5,000 school board members from across the state preparing to be a new board member next year, something I never thought I'd be. The first keynote speaker was Brandon P. Fleming, author of MISEDUCATED: A Memoir, an at-risk youth and college dropout turned award-winning educator. 

I felt that feeling of being seen and heard again because of a very specific part of his story. He was a failing black college student whose only role models were drug dealers and athletes. An English professor took the time "see" him, to meet him where he was in his life, to lead with love and help him turn his learning and his life around. She introduced him to black writers that he never knew existed and it changed his life forever. 

Brandon went on to finish college and launch a debate residency program that recruits under-served youth with no prior debate experience who he trains to compete against hundreds of elite debaters from over 25 different countries around the world. For five consecutive years, since the program’s inception in 2017, every cohort trained by Fleming has won the international competition.

My story was nothing like his. I was a privileged white high school student who got straight A's, took all the college-level AP classes, sang in choir, played football, and participated in student government. However, the pressure to constantly excel and the ghosts of my childhood growing up in domestic violence and sexual abuse became too much for me and I began to have severe anxiety and panic attacks. 

However, I didn't know what they were at the time. I began skipping classes, my grades suffered, and no one, not even my closest friends and immediate family, understood what was happening to me. It wasn't that they didn't love or care about me, but because I couldn't express what was happening to me, most took an arms-length approach with me. Everyone felt bad for me that I was breaking down, but no one could reach me. 

It wasn't until another high school counselor reached out to me when my perspective changed. Mr. Ash wasn't my primary academic counselor, but he connected with me in a way that others didn't. I told him as best I could what I was feeling and why, and he could relate; he had experienced that kind of stress when he was my age as well. He listened to my story without judgment, and shared his own story, and recommended that I take the time to heal and figure things out, that I should check out the field of psychology (which I ended up majoring in) but that I didn't necessarily need to go to college right away, if I needed more time. He took the time to "see" me, to meet me where I was in my life, to lead with love and help me turn my learning and my life around. 

Fully turning things around after high school would still take over a decade, but I got there. As a new school board member, I listened to Brandon P. Fleming speak and tears welled in my eyes. He said "stories are the gateway to empathy" and that as school administrators, educators, support staff, board members, and parents, we should "listen and love first, and then teach and lead second." Today, too many young people need mental health services, including elementary school kids, and we can do better to ensure they are emotionally, socially, and physically safe. We should meet each child where they're at, listen and love without judgement, and strive to provide the resources and support they need to thrive. 

The Leader in Bea

As Bryce and I approached Beatrice's camp, I could hear the accolades from the camp staff and the remaining campers. It was the last day of summer day camp for the season and Beatrice received high-fives and hugs from everyone. I could feel a proud smile grow big on my face. She had been a junior leader volunteer for the summer working with younger kids seven to eight years old and she loved every minute of it. And they loved every minute of her. 

This was something she wanted to do all year since being a camper at last summer's day camp. Back in early May of this year, I remember the video interview she did to become a junior leader. She was stressed prior to the interview, but she was so confident and calm during it. Just like her younger sister was when she spoke to her 5th graduating class at the end of May. 

Beatrice will definitely be a junior leader again and wants to be part of the staff in a couple of years. We're proud to be raising such confident and empathic leaders. Kids who have been part of a public school system that has served them well. That's not always the case in other places throughout America, and the system buckled and broken further during the pandemic, which has led to frustrated and angry parents, teachers, and administrators. 

Parents of varying socioeconomic backgrounds who have looked for alternatives like home schooling or school voucher programs that gives parents a choice of possible private school programs (if they can afford to supplement the cost not covered by their current public funding). Teachers and administrators who have looked for alternate professionals, completely burnt out by the constant harassment from frustrated and angry parents, and especially from the fringe political perspectives fueled by misinformation and outright lies. 

I can't and won't speak for the parents who've struggled with their children's education elsewhere because we haven't had those same experiences, but I will say we're so grateful for all the wonderful and caring teachers, support staff, and administrators we've had over the past 10+ years of public school to date, especially during the pandemic. Distance learning sucked on some level for everyone, and yet our children always had the academic and social support that have helped them thrive. Both my wife Amy and I have also been very involved in their schools and in their education, volunteering in and out of the classroom, running the PTA, and being on the school site council. 

Beatrice's summer camp leadership journey has definitely inspired me to stay involved in our community. At the beginning of summer, when she started her junior leader journey, I was contacted school district friends asking if I'd be interested running for school board in our area. At first, I wasn't sure I could make that kind of commitment with my current work-life balance; wasn't sure my lack of education background would be liability; wasn't sure if I had recovered fully from the fringe fallout I experienced when I was on the city commission for the prevention of violence against women. 

What I am sure of today is that I want the children in our public school district get the same level of individualized academic and social support they need that our children have received. They'll both be in middle school this year and still have 5+ years to go to finish high school. The superintendent of our city schools told me that public education is one of the cornerstones of democracy, and with our republic continuing to fray in the fringe, I wholeheartedly agree. So, I actually think I may run, all thanks to the leader in Bea.