The Teacher Parade

Everything changed for our kids on March 13. That's when the principal of our school sent the email out to all the parents stating: 

The health and safety of our community is always our highest priority.  Today we demonstrated that clearly by dismissing students from school for the next week.  All public schools in our county will be closed from March 16-20, 2020.

This due to the impact of coronavirus (COVID-19) on our lives. He ended the email with I look forward to seeing the Wildcats back on campus soon. Looking back, we obviously never went back, participating in nearly three months of distance learning from our public school. After every new day of working from home and schooling from home, my wife Amy and I got a little bit better with our cadence and working with our two daughters. Amy did most of the heavy lifting as she's always done, and thankfully since there's been no business travel for me since early March, I invested nearly every morning in our daughters' school work.

The girls' teachers also finally found their rhythm after the first few weeks of trying to figure out what the heck to do, how to teach online and how to ensure they were giving as much support per kid that they could. At first, they sent each family a sample checklist of work to do and a sample schedule of when to do it, and soon found that each family had their own unique situations and schedules. Soon after they moved to assigning work to the kids -- core reading, writing, math, science and more. I can't imagine what that transition was like for teachers, kids and parents not used to working this way, since I've worked virtually for nearly the past decade and run a virtual organization for the past five years. Of course, the reality for most parents was that school was/is a place of learning, of socializing, and also for child daycare. Add to that an after school program for kids whose parents and/or guardians worked all day. 

Then take it all away all at once. For those parents who remained employed, it became a juggling act of managing their jobs and managing their children at home. Plus, there were those families who didn't have internet at home and/or computer resources for their kids. Our school district, like many others, provided Chromebooks for families to use and tech companies donated WiFi hotspots for connectivity. We moved to virtual Zoom calls for the classes and leveraged Google Classroom for assigning work and completing it. Other outside resources were utilized as well, like Khan Academy, YouTube and others. 

Add to that families who lost their incomes and struggled to provide food and shelter for their kids. Thankfully our district provided breakfast and lunch for any children under 18 who it and will do so through the summer. 

Also, not all families got the resources or support they needed, and then there were those who just couldn't (or didn't) help their kids complete their schoolwork. Even with the support of our school district and school, and the teachers continuing to teach as best they could, it was a lot of work even for us. Their work totaled about 2-3 hours each day, being in 3rd and 5th grade, and we ensured our girls got the guidance and support they needed from us to get it all done. 

There's also a big difference between 2-3 hours of virtual learning and 6-7 hours of at-school learning, because there's been a whole bunch of time to fill in between and after. Especially when the parents are working. We also know it would've been exponentially harder if our girls were any younger. 

We did it, though. It was far from ideal and a lot of change all at once, and we still did it. We did it because we've always been invested in our girls' education. Regardless of our circumstance, it's an all-in investment for us, and we require the same from our girls. This was not what they signed up for either -- going from a pandemic to now social unrest in ever-changing world (we hope for the better). The girls have struggled with missing being at school and missing seeing their friends in person. 

The silver lining has been that, while our youngest Bryce is more autonomous with her schoolwork, her older sister Beatrice has benefited with more one-on-one attention from us helping her. That in turn prompted Bryce to want more individualized attention, which we also gave her. This hybrid world of virtual classroom instruction, virtual office hours with their teachers and our overall support definitely paid off for both girls. Again, not ideal, and we'll see what happens when we get to the next school year starting in August, knowing that our state will take a big hit in public school funding, equivalent to losing over $1,200 per student, probably even more than that. If there are in-person classes on campus again, they will be most likely smaller groups that will alternate days. 

We love our school, the teachers and the staff. The girls have been going there since preschool and we've been involved since the very beginning, especially Amy. She's also served as PTA president and vice-president for the past three years. However, because we couldn't do anything in person, the end-of-school activities and ceremonies were bittersweet. Beatrice finished 5th grade and will be going to middle school in the fall. She had a virtual "graduation" ceremony and then we drove through the school parking lot to get her leadership award certificate, club participation certificates, and her 5th grade completion certificate. Bryce will continue at the same school going into 4th grade, and her 3rd grade teacher put together a sweet awards ceremony, dubbing Bryce "Brilliant Bryce". Both their teachers worked hard at helping our kids finish as strong as possible considering the circumstances. Beatrice's band teacher also struggled to keep all the band kids engaged until the end of the year, and yet she still pulled together a wonderful virtual concert, with Bea being one fo the flute players. 

Out of all the end-of-year activities, the simultaneously most wonderful and heart-wrenching part was the teacher parade. Led by a police motorcycle escort and ending with a fire truck (one of the parents is a fireman), our principal, teachers and staff drove decorated cars from the school parking lot and down through many our school district neighborhoods. They waved at us cheering them on, and we held our signs of love and thanks proudly. In that moment, all the teachers I ever loved and cared about growing up, those who truly cared about me and who wanted me to learn and be a better human, I imagined were also riding in the cars with our girls' teachers. Tears streamed down my face and hope filled my heart for what's to come. 

Other "Days of Coronavirus" posts:

All These Things Can Lead To Grace

Our Freedom Is Always Welcome

A Well of Strength

This Bad History

No Shirts, No Shoes, No Problem

The Iceberg Underneath

The Healing Hope We Can Give

Donate Your Date Nights and Help Feed Families

About All The Things

Dad, Our Family's Computer Guy

The Newest Normal

Where Our Troubles Are All The Same

This Is The Life

When There's Nowhere to Go

Jenny, Jenny, Who Can I Turn To

The Newest Normal

Again, she couldn't fall asleep. Stressed about all the coronavirus disruption and missing school and maybe one of us getting sick, our oldest daughter Beatrice wrestles with her anxious thoughts at night because of all the changes (just like me her father when I was her age into my 20's). We still read with both our girls every night, and that normalcy helps, and if needed my wife Amy, Mom with a capital M, will have us all do relaxation, meditation, breathing exercises, and in case Beatrice needs it, we have a little Melatonin at the ready for her to take to help regulate her sleep-wake cycle. Amy and I take it every night as well to help sleep, because sometimes even our own anxious thoughts wrestle within.

We're now two weeks into virtual school and shelter-in-place and like millions of families everywhere today, it's taking different stressful tolls on our entire family, while at the same time, bonding us all closer than ever before. Yes, we can get on each other's nerves, but for the most part, we're doing really well and all getting along and our family love has never been stronger. We're keeping our minds and bodies active: doing science projects, cooking meals, playing games, reading and drawing, with plenty of downtime and nothing as well, and getting out for walks with our new dog Jenny, all the while ensuring the proper social distance between us and others to keep mitigating the virus spread (although, that's getting more awkward and stressful, not less). Heck, my wife and I are Gen Xers and we're actually okay with the social isolation and the downtime (to other Gen Xers, I recommend you read this great piece titled It Took a Global Pandemic, But Generation X is Finally Getting Love by Courtney Dabney -- it's super funny and true!)

We're also playing tennis, otherwise known as chase the balls for those of you like us who can't play very well. This includes Bryce whining a little about chasing the balls, even refusing to chase the balls, with an occasional strong volley between us all. Amy and I used to play randomly at courts that are down the street from us, which still haven't been locked up like many other similar outdoor venues. There's also a public exercise park next to the tennis courts and others have been using it and playing tennis like us, never with any crowds though, just a handful of people at any given time. Even before the lockdown started we'd take the girls to play tennis, using two tennis rackets and two racquet ball rackets. We just bought two inexpensive tennis rackets for the girls (via online order, not in person), so our game of ball chasing should improve the more we play.

However, both girls really miss school and their friends. They've had a few phone calls and video calls with their friends and also playing interactive multiplayer games like Roblox, something they were doing before the lockdown. But there's no more band for Bea. No more science camp that she'll never experience now. No more after school kids in nature program for Bryce. No more sports or run for fun, a weekly running club they were both in. No more after school musical theater that they've both loved so much. No more playdates with friends, except virtually. We've also been checking in with family too and that helps since we won't see them in person for who knows how long. 

And again, there's no more in-person school. They both really miss it, too. Their teachers having worked hard getting distance learning and video calls off the ground for their classes, to give us as parents some semblance of a structured school day. It helps, but mercy me do we appreciate our teachers more than ever. We've always been invested in helping both girls with their schoolwork, and Amy's done more of the heavy lifting here historically do to my work and travel schedule. But now travel is no more for me, so I can now help more during the school days. It's a lot, it really is, helping them with their work, checking it before they submit it, with both of us still working jobs virtually. My organization Talent Board is doing a lot more virtual events and Amy's organization Kidpower is doing the same. We are thankful we're currently employed as millions of people have already been laid off and many small businesses have closed. 

The Triple P– Positive Parenting Program in Santa Cruz County held a virtual parent check-in this last week and we talked about why it was so important to provide as much consistency and normalcy for our kids (and the parents, too) as possible during these stressful, changing times. To make sure that every family can access the internet and has a computer to access classes and schoolwork, at least for kids in grades 3 and higher, although they're working on plans for even younger kids. Our school district has been providing Chromebooks to families and donated wifi hotspots to those who have limited to no internet access. Plus, those families who depend on school meals for their children will continue to get them during the shelter-in-place while the schools are closed, which now will go through early May, and probably the rest of this school year into June. 

My best friend from college was just diagnosed with coronavirus, and while thankfully he's not in the hospital, he told me on the phone, "We can't live a normal life right now; we have to stay home." He's right. And that sucks. It's hard for our children and for the adults in the room, but again, when there's nowhere to go, the reality is that every day brings the newest normal, one that will never be the same as we pine nostalgic for the old. To continually adapt, we still have our weekly family meetings and we check in with each other and talk about all the things every day. The newest normal is the only life our families will know for now, so keep helping and supporting each other. Be safe and bless you.