Amen

And our children’s children: Solid as Barack

I got an email from my cousin this morning that basically requested friends and family to not watch Barack Obama's primetime coverage tonight at 8:00 p.m. PT (8:00 p.m. ET) titled Barack Obama: America Promises.

She's not happy about the excessive campaign spending that goes on and that if we all spent this same amount of time researching the issues on our ballots, or perhaps learning more about the candidates from a credible source, we would be more informed as an electorate.

While she definitely gave me something to chew on, and although I agreed with her in spirit, I would argue that a good percentage of the voting population (unfortunately) gets informed on politicians and issues via slanted, sound-byte T.V. I wish that weren't the case; I'm a big advocate of personal responsibility and being informed as objectively as possible from various reliable resources.

Until we have true campaign fundraising reform, private moneys raised will drive the candidates' messages (down our throats). It's a corrupt system, I know, but my wife and I support Senator Obama and have donated to his campaign, so I do hope the undecided electorate watches tonight.

I'm still pretty angry at the economic policy mistakes made by both sides of aisle since the Clinton administration about banking and financial service deregulation, and how the global pool of money incited riotous greed. Our children and our children's children will be paying for the multi-billion-dollar financial system bailouts (plus the 10-plus-billion-dollar-per-month illegitimate war bill).

That's excessive spending we're paying for whether we like it or not. And we don't like it.

Instead, we prefer being solid as Barack.

Daddy K says, Take responsibility for taking responsibility

Regardless of your politics, Senator Barack Obama delivered a compelling Father's Day speech last month about the need for responsible fathers. And although it was directed primarily toward African-America men, his words can be applied to all men and fathers. Thanks once again Wayne's Fatherhood Blog.

I've been thinking a lot about responsible fatherhood, and based on my childhood experiences, and the fact I'm having a child of my own now, I can't comment enough about it.

"Too many fathers are M.I.A, too many fathers are AWOL, missing from too many lives and too many homes. They have abandoned their responsibilities, acting like boys instead of men. And the foundations of our families are weaker because of it."

Amen, Barack.

And he should know, because he was raised by a single mother. But no, he's not Muslim. Really. Stop talking about it.

Even children that are adults whose father hasn't spoken to them for decades, or vice-versa, doesn't negate the fact that some kind of amends could be made. Whether a relationship can be rekindled after years of separation and neglect is secondary to asking for forgiveness and giving it as well. That is taking responsibility for not taking responsibility and forgiving the unforgiveable.

According to Marie Hartwell-Walker, Ed.D., in an article titled Fathering in America: What's a Dad Supposed to Do?, regardless of whether the father lives with his children, active participation in raising those children is good for everyone.

Amen, Dr. Marie.

She goes on to highlight practical guidelines for responsible fatherhood. Here are some of my favorites:

Embrace your responsibility. Once you are a father, you are a father for life. The knowledge of fatherhood changes a man. It can be a source of pride and maturity or a source of shame and regret. Even if you have good reasons for not being actively involved, acknowledging your paternity is a minimal gift you can provide to your child. With it come many legal, psychological, and financial benefits. If you want to be in your child's life, it also protects your rights to have time with your child should you and the child's mother have a falling out.

Be there throughout their childhoods. There is no time in a child's life that doesn't count. Research has shown that even infants know and respond to their fathers differently than they do to their mothers. The bond you make with a baby sets the foundation for a lifetime. As the kids get older, they'll need you in different ways but they will always need you. Insistent toddler, curious preschooler, growing child, prickly adolescent: Each age and stage will have its challenges and rewards. Kids whose parents let them know that they are worth their parents' time and attention are kids who grow up healthy and strong. Boys and girls who grow up with attention and approval from their dads as well as their moms tend to be more successful in life.

Balance discipline with fun. Some dads make the mistake of being only the disciplinarian. The kids grow up afraid of their dads and unable to see the man behind the rules. An equal and opposite mistake is being so focused on fun that you become one of the kids, leaving their mother always to be the heavy. Kids need to have fathers who know both how to set reasonable, firm limits and how to relax and have a good time. Give yourself and the kids the stability that comes with clear limits and the good memories that come with play.

Be a role model of adult manhood. Both boys and girls need you as a role model for what it means to be adult and male. Make no mistake: The kids are observing you every minute. They are taking in how you treat others, how you manage stress and frustrations, how you fulfill your obligations, and whether you carry yourself with dignity. Consciously or not, the boys will become like you. The girls will look for a man very much like you. Give them an idea of manhood (and relationships) you can be proud of.

The B file: We can get back on

It's a far cry from the world we thought we'd inherit

It's a far cry from the way we thought we'd share it

You can almost feel the current flowing

You can almost see the circuits blowing

One day I feel I'm on top of the world

And the next it's falling in on me

I can get back on

I can get back on

One day I feel I'm ahead of the wheel,

And the next it's rolling over me

I can get back on

I can get back on…

--Neil Peart

Yes, we can get back on, we can get back on. No matter what happens growing up, I finally learned years ago that the alternative isn't one. That goes in the B file.

But what's the real ulterior motive of this post? As Mama A and Baby B roll their eyes, kick and squirm, I revel in my unadulterated plug for my boys in Rush who were finally given their just deserts in the latest issue of Rolling Stone (that includes a great article on Senator Obama as well).

Living in the limelight the universal dream…

Baby B casts a vote; Daddy K yearns for yang

I don’t discuss politics much and certainly don’t want to use this forum to sway any way other than encouraging folk to make a positive difference in their lives and the lives around them. There are plenty of prolific journalists and bloggers in the world who can give you much more insightful political commentary, no matter which way you swing. I’m usually on the fence initially, but if you hit me hard enough, I almost always fall to the left.

Whack. Whoopsie.

Compared to the short history of this great country, in this year alone, the year we’ll be having our first child, a woman and a black man have run for president and have garnered more primary votes than any other candidate before them (Okay I didn’t fact check this and Whoopi Goldberg says I can say black man. We’re good. Yes, I watch The View with Mama A. Is there a problem?) Of course based on this alone doesn't make them the right choice for president, but I do like what they have to say and where they stand.

The past decade has been so polarizing and divisive in American politics, but I’m still proud to be an American and always will be. We’ve traveled all over the world and there’s still no place like home.

No matter your opinions about Hillary Clinton, it was a tough road for her. It always has been for women. I can say this with certainty from growing up with women who had to do daily battle with the men in their lives, sometimes just to stay alive, literally and figuratively, personally and professionally. Baby B will know these stories someday and be a champion for healing and personal responsibility whether a boy or girl (and if he/she ever sneaks out of the house as a teenager, he/she will know the healing glory of backhanded faith smacks – Amen).

Read Lysistrata. Read Margaret Atwood. Read Maya Angelou. Read about Eve, Esther and Deborah. Listen to Tori Amos. Pretend there is no Ann Coulter.

Please. I beg of you.

And anyone who knows anything about black history knows how far we’ve come to the tune of “all men [and women] are created equal” to have a presidential nominee like Barack Obama. (I’m an Obama girl now. Is there a problem?)

And I should give equal time to John McCain. I’m sure he’s a nice man.

Look out Baby B. Here comes history!

I came across a passage in 1776 about a young black poet, Phillis Wheatley, who sent George Washington a poem written in his honor:

Proceed, great chief, with virtue on thy side
Thy every action let the goddess guide.

Now, queue the music…

’Cause I gotta crush on Obama.

Notice how I didn’t use the word “change” once.