Mama A says, “That darn cat…”

"…is gonna die."

Not really. Maybe just get drop-kicked across the room. It's bad enough that Amy's not sleeping well with amped hormonal surges and baby-on-bladder syndrome. Now our lovely calico, Chelsea, who is 19 years old and not going anywhere anytime soon, either:

1. Sits right in front of Amy's face and wakes her with tickling whiskers.
   
2. Walks over Amy's head or belly to reach her favorite spot in between after returning from her nocturnal haunts.
   
3. Launches a whiny meowing jag at 4, 5 and/or 6 a.m.
   
4. All of the above or some combination thereof.

These housecat behaviors where troublesome at times prior to being pregnant (and the spray bottle full of water doesn't work as well as you'd think), but considering yesterday morning Amy could've lifted a bus to throw at the cat, and thank God she didn't, we need to get her some better sleep before we start throwing the cat at the baby.

It's a joke. Really. No worries.

I did some research on one of the sites we visit weekly, the America Pregnancy Association, because I bounce online all the time.

Whack –

How can I cope with insomnia during pregnancy?

1. Try new sleeping positions

2. Prepare yourself for bedtime by taking a warm bath or receiving a nice massage

3. Set up your room for a comfortable sleep setting by changing your thermostat to a comfortable temperature and playing some relaxing or natural sounds that can help make you sleepy

4. Try relaxation techniques such as the ones you have learned in your childbirth class

5. If you still cannot fall asleep you should get up; you might read a book, watch TV, eat a small snack or fix some warm milk

6. Exercising during the day

7. If you have the opportunity to sleep during the day you should take it!

But no matter what, don't throw the cat out with the disposable diapers. Landfills are too full.

Mama A regains her balance with cat in lap

Mama A has been one of the lucky pregnant women. To date she's had minimal symptoms – no morning sickness, no excessive fatigue, no headaches (only a couple of mini-migraines sans Dr. Evil).

But now that she's a little larger (and so very delectable), some things aren't as easy as they used to be. A few weeks ago we went on a hike at Wilder Ranch State Park, and on the tail end of our hike, Amy had to, shall we say, go tinkle.

I always loved that Amy wears baseball caps and has no problem going when she needs to go. However, doing so on a hillside when you're almost six months pregnant and your uterus has grown into a lovely honeydew, ain't the same thing. I was on lookout for her when I heard:

"Whoaaaa! Whoaaaa! Help me, sweetie."

I had to reach down and grab her hand while she regained her balance and overcame bladder vertigo. Close call. A urinary cliffhanger.

Laughing and bladder control. Need I say more.

And in week 29 according to one of the many sites we read, did you know that the baby is even urinating about a half liter of urine into the amniotic fluid every day?

The night before last Amy woke in terrible pain, her left leg cramping miserably. I did the best I could helping her stretch it out, which alleviated some of the pain. She was still sore yesterday but better.

According to the American Pregnancy Association site, leg cramps may be caused by the additional weight gain of pregnancy and changes in your circulation. Pressure from the growing baby may also be placed on the nerves and blood vessels that go to your legs. This pressure or pinching may be the cause of your leg cramps.

Yikes.

One or more of the following interventions may help to relieve or prevent leg cramps:

1. Exercise regularly; include stretches that target your calves

2. Rest with your legs elevated

3. Wear supportive stockings

4. Massage your calves and feet

5. Apply local heat

6. Relax in a chair with cat in lap

What? Cat in lap? In French, chat dans le recouvrement? In Spanish, el gato en regazo!